Monday, October 26, 2009

Casual Controversy: Pet Costumes

Hello casual companions. I hope this monday evening finds you in a hot tub, naked, beverage in hand. If not, you should work on that...Now to the matter at hand.
Halloween is just around the corner and while we all love dressing up like rambunctious midgets looking for eggs on Easter, I must do the good lord's work and ask that you all refrain from the urge to dress your unwilling pets in horribly uncomfortable and utterly disgraceful pet garb.
Lets be clear. Animals should NEVER wear clothes. If they are mammals, they already have coats on all the time. You are not doing them a service. And if your dressing your fish in a wetsuit equipt with snorkle, well then that's pretty epic and I'll let it slide just this once. Aside from that, the only garments ever to be adorned by animals are sun glasses, and only with inter-species consent. Why on earth would you have the bright idea of dressing up your cat or dog as another animal, let alone a person? A dog is a dog, will always be a dog and will never be a frog. Give up the dream.
Now, it should go without saying, but there seems to be a number of psychotic women who just don't get it; treating their tiny dogs like little slave children: DON'T EVER PUT A PET IN A STROLLER!! This is the most depressing and idiotic, not mention highly uncasual thing a human can do to an animal. Miniature zoos on wheels, ugh. Wheeling your dog around like a helpless baby does not qualify as WALKING it!! They have legs for a reason and they like to excersise them. If you really need control, use the leash for god sake. I hate to break it to you, but your dog HATES you. It spends all day wishing it had opposable thumbs so that it could unbuckle its seatbelt, pick up a knife and stab you through your sick little heart. If you do this (pet strolling), or even think about doing this, you will spend eternity in your own personal hell which consists of you strapped tightly in a small stroller, being pushed around in the 90 degree heat by a giant dog with sunglasses, while humungous cats in suits and top hats stop on the street to stare and pinch your cheeks. You sick fucks. Get a life. It's not the dogs fault your kids don't love you. Maybe you shouldn't have tortured them either. Get a gold fish and get him some scuba gear stat.
I know violence is not casual, but its for the pets. C'mon.

Baby kitties keep it casual.
PETA does not. To hell with them too.


  1. Hhahaha funny pictures, I dont think it is cruel to dress up a pet, I think they look adorable, the last picture with the cat with hat and the bow tie is awesome, looks so cute.

  2. I can't believe this, OK I love my pet, but I never spend a cent in cloths for it, in this world there's a lot of people who live in the streets, why the who buy this don't take the money and donate to charity.